My New Years' resolution was to take better care of myself. Specifically, I'm going to do three things 1. eat better 2. drink less 3. avoid hanging out with people who make me feel bad about myself....There, now I've written it down so let's see how long I can stick to it!

khart

I think that it's really starting to sink in that it's over. I'm really out of control now.

I can't stop crying for hours on end, sometimes to the point of making myself ill. Even when I'm out sometimes I just can't help starting to cry.  I can't sleep, I'm having trouble eating, and I'm having a lot of panic attacks. When I'm not panicking I just have this constant anxiety and tightness in my chest. I feel so lonely and just totally alone. I've lost probably 10 - 15 pounds in the last 6 or 7 weeks. I'm losing interest in everything, from showering and getting dressed to my usual activities. I just feel so drained.

I feel like I'm collapsing and falling apart. Like my life is destroyed.

My chest hurts and it is so hard to breathe.  I need this to stop please, please.

I was curious to know if anyone has any success stories.  I don't smoke (well, if you ask my bf i do... I don't consider 1 or 2 cigarettes a week smoking, but it makes him feel better, I guess ).  This is about him.  He says he wants to stop, but I'm not so sure he wants to put forth the effort to do it.  I honestly don't think he could be around people who do smoke, if he is trying to quit. And when he is alone, and bored, he will smoke.  It's a part of his life.

 The topic has come up again, by him (I never bring it up, because it's something he has to want to do).  We've talked about a few different avenues to pursue to really try to do it.  But since he has been bringing it up, am i permitted to be a nag about it, if he does attempt to quit?

Depression for me is having the world by the ass and not being able to enjoy it and really focus on what you have.

-trip

hi all,
I am new here but have been lurking for a few months. I am hoping someone can help me. My ex and I separated over a year ago and our official court hearing was last Friday. I was not a good wife and had some serious issues to be addressed. After we separated (exactly a year ago)I was doing well for a while, I moved home with my parents, addressed some personal issues that needed to be handled, etc. I started seeing someone after about 8 months and we are still together. I was feeling really good until I moved back to the big city I was living in before (ex was supposed to follow me when I moved but never did).

My anxiety now is often out of control. It's often the worst in the morning, I often vomit when I wake up. I am doing my best to put one foot in front of the other, I go to work, I see friends. I have never like, shown up at our old home or anything. Our court date was the first time I had seen him in 2007. I obsess over my ex even though I am the one who left the relationship. I feel like I am somehow cheating on my current boyfriend, though I do have feelings for him. I often feel so depressed at the loss of my ex. He has been incredibly closed off, he's told me he's moved on and doesn't think about me anymore. I had to return to our old home to move out when we had our hearing and it looked like it had turned into some sort of frat house. He did not look well when I saw him. It was very odd.

I am taking anti anxiety and anti depressant medication and attending therapy and twelve step meetings but my days are still often relentless. It's been more than a year.

can anyone offer advice?

thanks, klg

My husband and i were married for 3 and half years and he decided to have an affair. So we decided to seperate. Now its  been 8 mths and I am at a point to where I want to get back together and work on our marriage. We never talked about our problems and we never worked on them. we always just swept them under a rug and everyone knows that when you do that it comes back to haunt you. I am gettting tired of wondering when he is coming back if even decides to. he is the one that left so i feel that he should be the one that comes back. I have tried to talk about this situation but he just acts as if he is so done with it.  I don't want to rush it and of course we all need our space. i guess what I am wondering is should i just move on or should i try again being that its been 8 mths since everything has happen. Should i approach him with what I want? How would you all handle this situation? he still loves and care its like he is waiting on something what i don't know all I know is that I am tired of the waiting game and would like some advice on how you all would handle the situation

Everything annoys the ever loving s**t out of me. My kids dad is an as* hole and i hate him my room mate drive me nuts and the man i love doesnt love me. my mom makes me want to punch a wall and the only thing i can take is my kid. its as if life just sucks and hates me more than i hate it. please what the hell do i do to calm down and forget the stress?

Hello all, I am new to this and have been pondering my thoughts for a long time now and need some advice.  My wife and I have been together for 5 years and married for 18mo. She was diagnosed with depression about 30mo ago when her father nearly died in a car accident. Her father has brain damage and has a hard time remembering things, even names so I know that affects her.

She is on medication and before the wedding everything was fine. 7mo after the wedding she lost her job due to depression and it caused a major land slide in our income. Living solely off my income, it was hard making ends, especially with 2 kids, a now 7 year old and a 11 year old. I worked hard getting a 2nd job and all, but we still were not making things fit since my wife was forced to cut the unneccessary spending. We were seeing a psychologist for her depression and they helped a little bit, but financially we were hurting. We were forced to go into bankruptcy because paying our school loans, 2 car notes, and a mortgage is extremely hard with my salary. Even at that, paying for the house we had, it depended on her income tremendously. We were forced to sell our home and move into a 3 bedroom apartment townhome. This sparked up the depression big time.

And because of that, it brings us to where we are now. I know she is in a huge state of depression, but it is really starting to bring me down and the kids notice (mainly my daughter) that I am unhappy. I picked up playing soccer to keep my sanity. Everytime I try talking to my wife or just spend time with her, I get "yelled out" for something stupid. And it bothers me because she gets a short temper with the kids and I usually butt in just to get her off their backs. This has been going on for about 5 months now and it is really bringing me down to the point where I am not happy at all. I know I love her, but to me, she just isn't the person that I first fell in love with.

I did manage to get a new job that doubled my income (which helps because it covers her slack) but that doesn't really help at this point considering I just started and I am trying to catch up on the small things.

I feel like if I was to mention divorce, it would tear her apart due to the depression, but how can I handle this situation when I am miserable?

I apologize if this is long, just trying to get the whole story out.

Desperately seeking advice,

I feel I am doing pretty good considering what I've been through, but I often wonder if a therapist could help.  My friends at work seem to think I am holding on to anger and I have to let it go.  I don't think I am ready to let it go.  I get all kinds of suggestions.  One lady at work actually tells me that I should pray for my wife.  Pray that she lives a happy and healthy life.  Supposedly that will help me release my anger.  Thats not gonna happen.  I only pray when I mean it and I definitely wouldn't mean that prayer.

So that leaves me at questioning whether or not I should seek therapy.  Any of you out there that have gone through therapy, did it help?  Did it help with the anger and the unanswered questions?

Had a stressful day today and of course, any and all stress goes straight to my spinal injuries, causing bearable pain to be unbearable.

So, I make an appt with my Acupuncturist/Chiropractor until I get into see my new Neurosurgeon and Physical Therapist. 

He does some laser work with something that feels like a pen up and down my spine in the thoracic area and immediately, I feel really dizzy.  Believe it or not, it was moving things along enough to make me dizzy while lying on my stomach?  When he touched certain areas, it was like someone was stabbing me.  He said that was because I was so inflamed in those areas.  Then he turns me over and turns my head to each side and snaps my neck with a metal object that just gives a quick, swift snap under my ears.  As soon as he does this, I start sneezing uncontrollably, nose and eyes running, dizzy.  I felt so much better after 15 minutes, I actually reached down for my shoes with less pain than I have since my most recent accident in March!  I'm so excited!  I can't believe how the body works.  I can't wait to go back on Wednesday.

Just wanted to share with those that are leary like I was before I started seeing this guy a few years ago.  Now, I just feel stupid for waiting so long to go back to him.  I'm telling ya, the slightest thing in one area of the body can loosen things up in a totally different part of the body.  I know it's not all in my head because I had my doubts I'd feel any kind of difference, let alone any level of relief when I went in this evening.

I start physcial therapy again this week and I don't even want to go now.  I'm all about the quickest, most effective way to results, but I suppose I should go in with an open mind since I got such good results today when I had no expectations.   

Crushy 

i am currently Stationed in iraq and have been her for the past 6 months. i am married to a wonderful woman and we have 2 boys together. My wife and i have been together for 9 years and have been thru 3 near death experiences as well as alcohol and adultery and have pulled thru it.
When my our second son was born she was told she has post pardon depression. she could not see it. she took Zoloft for abut 3 days then stopped. it was bad for a while after that. she was not working and was staying at home all day not doing anything but playing on the computer. i was able to talk her into getting a job and when she started she was wonderful. she seems a lot happier and our marriage and life was picking up. I then got orders to come to Iraq and she seems to be able to take care of that fact. once i got over here we started to become distant. she wouldn't pick up the phone as much. not log onto the internet so we can talk. i found out she was drinking a lot and her coworkers were concerned about maybe drugs. When i came back for R&R and spent some time with her she seems to be happy and was actually having fun. once i left to go back she quit her job, and drove cross country to drop off our sons at my mothers and then just drove off, she wont tell anyone where she is going. she emails me all the time and says she need to prove to herself she can take care of herself. i know she has depression and have asked to get some help before making such a drastic action. she wont listen to me. wont listen to any of her family.I am afraid she will do something that she will never be able to get out of of. she has had a very hard childhood and has made her feel she needs to deal with everything on her won. i have no idea what to do. I love you and want to do all i can for her. but i cant deal with it much longer. any help or idea would be helpful. sorry about the length for this