my story and help? twoaremine: Hello, I am recently seperated and am very unclear as to what my rights are and how this whole "marital assets" works. My situation is that I became very sick a month ago, with Bells Palsy, having been dealing with a very controlling and mentally abusive husband, I was already contiplating leaving, but not sure how to do it. I have been a stay at home Mom with 2 kids, ages 2 and 6 for 4 yrs. I am also currently in process of applying for disability, for a different ailment, I had hip surgery following septic blood/bone infection. I was very sick the first week with this bells palsy, which by the way was due to stress...anyways, he began to "tease and mock" me, my face is paralyzed on the left side, so when we would argue of course I looked rediculous, so he was teasing and mocking me and laughing at me, so I told him either he had to go or I had to take the kids and leave so that I could get well. My doctor said I had to reduce all stress if I wanted to get better. My thinking was that we would take a break and I could recover without arguing and then whenever I was better we could get back together. WE have been married 8 yrs. Well...... he moved out, rented his own place , which is more expensive then ours, and now I found out he has been seeing someone, most likely since before he left the home. I am thinking that he has abandoned us, which he pretty much has. He has been hiding money, I just found out he was making signifigantly more than I thought and that our health insurance is $500. cheaper on him than he was telling me. He has also bought in the last month, a new truck, a new car , new clothes, new shoes and has been seeing this girl ,we will call "Tramp" for all intents and purposes.
What are my rights here and is he allowed to just spend all of OUR money on whatever he wants and get away with it??? also, if he sells vehicles, purchased during our marriage, do I have a right to 1/2? also: we are not legally seperated, and I never intended for this to be a divorce or permanent seperation. What are my rights and how does this work?????? please answer if you could to my email directly , in case I lose this link... <Michael - deleted email>
I have had to apply for assistance, and is that ok too???? will i get in trouble for applying for food stamps, etc..???
Sincerely,
Lisa
Re:my story and help? Sad Eyes: Lisa~
Sorry you are going through all of this! Nobody deserves to be treated like that and nobody deserves to be abandoned....especially family! :-\
I am sure you have rights here...you have too! I am not that far along in my situation to give you any advice but I seen this tonight and wanted to bump this back onto the first page for you so other can chime in here and give you advice. :)
Keep your head up and stay strong!!! Hopefully me bumping this thread will catch some eyes of some people who know something about this. ;)
Good Luck!!! :)
SE
*BUMP!!*
Re:my story and help? twoaremine: Thank you very much for the encouraging words.. the only thing good coming out of all this is of course, number one my children are with me and we are finally living in peace and quiet, but also I am finally losing weight... yeeeehaaaa
I just need to find out if he is allowed or able to get away with spending all OUR money,,,, isn't it considered Marital funds and taking away from the family....??? and isn't he legally still responsible for the bills..???? I am disabled and he is the lease holder, me the occupant... lease based on his income , not mine.... going in, he was the liable party for the bills...???????????
I am so confused.Also not sure if I wrote it, we are still legally married, not legally seperated, he chose to LEAVE granted, it was miserable with him here, but he chose to desert us...know what I mean???... soooo.. I don't know.
any advise would be appreciated.
TY,
Lisa ???
Re:my story and help? AmyMarie1972: Hi Lisa,
i really wish that I could give you all the answers but the honest truth is that i don't know. I had the joint bank account frozen so that he couldn't get the money from it and I took over all the bills.
I do hope that you can get help on this.
Maybe the local library could help, there must be books on it.
Am glad that you and your children are happier and that you are loosing weight. Congratulations on that.
Take care
Amy
Re:my story and help? summerparis: Twoaremine, I'm very impressed by your strength and courage in this face of a very difficult situation. It seems to me that your first priority is to resolve the financial/legal aspects of your situation, so that you don't end up with even more stress that you don't deserve. You need to get to a lawyer a.s.a.p., preferably one who specializes in marital and family law, who can answer all your questions and advise you of your rights. Many lawyers are willing to offer a sliding fee scale. There are also legal aid societies that would offer you free legal services and pro-bono lawyers (free lawyers). Look on the internet, the public library, at churches and schools, etc. Please keep the bb posted. Best of luck to you. xox Songbird
