How do you get them off their pedastal mophead123: I took my ex down off the pedastal a few weeks ago i.e. stopped blaming myself for everything and started seeing things more objectively. She cheated on me, lied, and deceived me over the course of 5 months. It was devastating. All the while she told me how much she loved me etc...
Yes we were going through a rough period, but she didn't fight for us at all. She just ran to the first available guy and started seeing him. When I eventually confronted her about it all, she just denied everything until I presented proof. It was just ugly.
Anyway, about three weeks ago, she finally returned this chain I gave her during our rough time...my most prized possesion passed down in my family. I asked for it back. Anyway, she sent it back along with a gucci wallet I had bought for her for Valentine's day. That was the ammunition I needed to say "screw you" and take her down off her pedastal.
Recently however, I am extremely lonely and want her back again or at least miss her and she is back up there where she started. How do you all take your ex's off the pedastal and keep them down?
Re:How do you get them off their pedastal faith: Sorry I don't have much advice for you. I was lucky enough that my STBX kept doing things to knock himself off the pedastal.
I thought he was a wonderful man and had an amazing heart. He did everything in his powers to prove me wrong. I stand corrected!
Re:How do you get them off their pedastal Samarra: Hey mophead,
That;s a good start. The only way I know of to dethrone them...is to see them for who they really are...warts an' all.
Seems like after a break, all we remember is the good times...that's fine...keep those for later. Right now you seem to have great fodder...keep thinking of how she wronged you...play that little scenario over and over again...then go pummel something. Works for me...and I sleep like a baby.
Re:How do you get them off their pedastal riversandlakes: i was naive. i was young. i was 21. that was four years ago. i treated her too well for her own good. she forgot the world out there is ruled by Jungle Law.
she lied and blamed me for her death. in the first two months i accepted this and other angles, then started to apply my head onto the free-flowing bleeding heart.
when this joke started, in the VERY beginning, i ask myself the right question all along,
"Is this kind of woman worth keeping at my side?"
strangely my closest family were very against me asking and acting on this question. I think it would have shortened my agony. but i figured they were with much level head than i was. i was wrong (again).
it is not about being level-headed. it is about being analytical and logical when the situation stinks sky-high of emotions.
simply put, they have not grown up. it takes this and many factors to wise up a person. more often than not, only after scores of mistakes were made, and always after it was too late.
for most humans seek not to learn NOT through their own mistakes...
imho, there is no pedestal. it is us doing our time to become wiser. with wisdom, we'll know this person is not worth of our sacred heart. that will keep us moving forward.
Re:How do you get them off their pedastal Lumpy: Dear Mophead,
Rivers and Lakes hit it right on the head. You have to take emotion out of the equation. Let me put it this way...You've got a bad piece of meat sittin' in your fridge.It's green.Fuzzy stuff is growing on the sides of it.It's stinkin' up the whole house. Do you say Damn, at one time, that was a fine cut of meat? That would have made some really tasty BBQ? No...You'd throw it out and clean it up and be done with it. That was quite possibly the most retarded metaphor to ever appear on this board but I hope you get the point.
