Re: Runaway train hudson: Hey mophead. Well, you already know from our past interaction, we share a lot in common as far as what we feel and have felt in our break ups. It used to be such a shock to the system everytime I thought of how easily my exw gave up all that we had shared, we had built, we had invested, we had loved with each other. She turned her back and simply walked away. Don't ask me how, I called is subhuman, inhuman and I still do. I don't get it. All I can say is, some people just have the ability to detach emotionally to prevent themselves from ever getting hurt. I don't know if that's true of your stbx but it sure was of mine.
You will work through this stuff. And you will find yourself to have become so much a better man because of all of this. Have faith.
Hang in there okay? we're here for ya.
Runaway train mophead123: I don't know why but I woke up this morning all pissed off again. I think I have notcied as the days go by that it isn't that I think about her any less, it's just I can let those feelings come in and out much more easily. They don't get trapped inside me. I have ventilation if you will and the feelings come in and out like osmosis.
But this morning I got into a little funk. I still can't get over how she threw away years together in a matter of weeks. When she told she wanted some time off to think and get her priorities in her life together I honored this request. When we met a few weeks later I asked her how she was, what she was thinking and she assured me..."Don't worry, I'm not running away from this...I just need to solve it myself." Well...if that isn't twisting the truth just a bit. Later when finding out about her "friend" I got the "He is just someone I get advice from." You know I would never cheat on you." "You know my personality." She then blamed me for not giving her enough pictures of us. We always traveled together and I took a bunch of pictures. She never seemed at all interested. She wanted me to bid for her love with this guy or something.
But how does one throw away so many wonderful memories and experiences just like that. She even admitted, all I know are his good qualities. I know this all isn't real...She got swept up in the newness the lust...and just took off. What kind of person does that? And how can you be telling him you love him and miss him after a month. Those are my feelings....you stole them and tranferred them to him you stupid b!tch. Why don't you see that! How can you claim to know what love is. You don't treat people you love the way you treated me. Even my worst enemy would have more respect you heartless wench! You ran away without even telling me you were getting on that train. I had to dig and dig and dig to finally find proof that you had already left. you didn't even have the decency to be honest and you just lied and lied and lied that you weren't going anywhere til the bitter end. Then when I finally show you you can't deny it anymore, you try to act wounded and beg me to give one more chance. Why would I suddenly believe anything you say to me now?
All I know is when the train comes home...I'll be long gone. I hope the trip was worth it.
Re: Runaway train AfterMath: mophead,
Put some pure distance between you & her if you can. A high speed train does wonders in that regard (quick weekend away, i.e. to anywhere). I won't sugar coat it. You'll wake up many more mornings pissed, about the relationship, whatever.
Don't try & understand at this point. You need to put yourself first. It's hard, but needed right now! Keep posting, Always feel free to PM.
Re: Runaway train mophead123: We have put distance. It ended three months ago and I not made any contact. She tried to write me a mail or two (one on the bday) mostly just saying I hope you are always happy. I read that and it made me even more pissed. Now looking back..should I have replied and tried to work on us...Given her one more chance. My take was in order for that to happen she needed to show her sincerity to wanting me back. But she found this other guy and was into him and could either go the hard way or the easy way. It's clear which way she chose. I probably would have given her another chance if she really showed how committed she was at the time. Instead I heard from her frien she felt so guilty about not only what she did to me but also to the OM. What the hell is that sh!t! The night I ended it...she said "if the two of you met, I don't know what I would have done. Then I might have been all alone." Talk about issues. Who the fuc! are you?
The hardest part is letting go of the image I held of her. I feel as if I forever was holding onto fools gold...this part just crushes me!
Re: Runaway train Kermie: Damn the more and more I read on this board the more I feel less alone in this world. I thought my soon to be exwife was the only cold hearted non feeling thing on this planet and throwing away 14 years worth of memories and happiness over some OG was a rare thing. It does baffle the mind but I just keep thinking if she was that way with me at the end why in the world would I ever want that back again. I am gettting happier and happier everyday that some other shmuck has to deal with her sorry a$$ now and not me.
