So angry I never got a 2nd chance kfc75: I look at everything, lossing a wife, a home we worked so hard to buy, not getting to see my beautiful son everyday. But what really pisses me off is the fact I never got a second chance, the only reason I get for all of this is "a bunch of little stuff, and it all adds up to something big" If its only a bunch of little stuff wouldn't it be easy to change?
WTF!!!! I could change a bunch of little stuff if it would make a difference.
The truth is I don't think it is a bunch of little stuff, I don't think she even knows why, the little stuff is her justification.
Re: So angry I never got a 2nd chance Ilosther: Just saw this post, I PMd u earlier.
I hear you about the little things and no 2nd chance. We deserve a 2nd chance! But they wont give it to us. Those little things that we know we can change or improve on, I feel are not the reason for them leaving. Mine just has personal issues she never took care of while with me. Even counselling has pointed this out. The little things are just excuses that help them add up things and justify and make them feel less guilty for destroying what we once saw as a perfect marriage and family.
I have accepted that I will never understand why mine ever felt this way, I know that I will never understand this but I will try my best to just accept that us separating is the only way for her to figure stuff out. If she files for divorce, or comes back to me, at least she figured it out.
The kicker is, will be give them a 2nd chance if it comes to it? I hope I do, and I hope I have that chance to decide.
Good luck!
Re: So angry I never got a 2nd chance rnoble74: i feel like you guys are writing my life story, if you read mine on "tell your story here" you will see what i mean. and they say guys are dogs, i think all heartless people are evil and selfish pigs, sorry to sound so harsh >:(
Re: So angry I never got a 2nd chance Blueyes424: I have to chime in here, because I am a woman and opinionated!! ;)
To defend some of us, I DID give my ex a 2nd chance....in fact I gave him several, and he always promised to change and that things would be different.....even after the counseling and everything. He did change for a while, but then returned to the same crap that he was pulling before. The hitting, the mean words, all of it.
That's not to say that in a future relationship I wouldn't give someone a second chance if I felt that they deserved it, just as I would hope that they would give me the second chance as well.........
just my 2 cents
~Blue
Re: So angry I never got a 2nd chance genesplicer: I can totally relate to the lack of getting a second chance, it goes both ways
But I have to agree with Havehope that these 'little' things really aren't the reasons they leave. I think it just makes it easier for them to justify what they are doing in their own minds, if you have a mountain of reasons, however small well you must be doing the right thing... or so they tell themselves.
Otherwise they might have to think that maybe what they are doing isn't the right thing, and often times it isn't (we don't think it is anyway) but we're all human and it's hard to knowingly take the cowardly way out, so they find these reasons to make them right, make them the good guy (or gal)...
Feels like I'm talking in circles, so i'll stop now. :)
