Stay w/ Married Last Name Or Go Back To Maiden? ColoHill: Just curious for you ladies,
After your divorce, did you go back to your maiden name or did you still keep your married last name? What about those of you with kids? Did it make a difference in what you did? I am having an internal debate and wanted to get some of your ideas...
Thanks!
Re: Stay w/ Married Last Name Or Go Back To Maiden? LostTeacher: went back to my maiden name as soon as i could.
it was a bit difficult at times. i had to get a legal name change filled out (cost $120!), and then the pain of changing all of my paper work again. plus at school, i had to wait for a while longer, becuase it's a bit difficult to explain the change to the kids if it just happens out of nowhere. i had to wait until the end of the semester to do it. was a hard thing to tell them, but very happy now.
i was a very happy person to take my H name....and now when someone calls me by that....it makes me cringe!
changing my name back was the best thing for me. i now will probably never change my name again. not worth the trouble...and i am proud of my name. there are only girls in my family anyway (me and a sister) so i will probably keep the name.
Re: Stay w/ Married Last Name Or Go Back To Maiden? genesplicer: I'm definitely changing back to my maiden name when the divorce is finalized. We don't have any children, so it's probably an easier decision for me. I think I've got two main reasons for doing so: First, it will be one less daily reminder of days gone by to deal with as I try to heal, and secondly I think it will be a good way to help reclaim myself and the person I want to become.
A milestone of moving on perhaps...
Re: Stay w/ Married Last Name Or Go Back To Maiden? tyrogers: In the State of Alabama, you cannot go back to your maiden name if you have children. So you have no choice. You cannot change your name until you re-marry. They want the parent to have the same last name as the child. Which is BS considering I have two children with two different last names. I will always be Ms. N to T's friends and I will always be Ms. R to M's friends......until they are old enough to know better.
Bible belt down here, gotta love it. :P
BBH
Re: Stay w/ Married Last Name Or Go Back To Maiden? timetobefree: I went back to my maiden name, although I don't have children. It was never anything I debated.
I was 26 when we got married, 29 when we got divorced. I had accomplished a lot in the first 26 years of my life as Amy Maiden, including graduating magna cum laude from college and grad school. As Amy Married, well, not quite as much. Another reason is my ex has a very unique last name, while mine is quite common. The town we live in is on the smaller side, and is filled with his relatives. Everyone knows the last name here. They own half the town. I didn't want to continually answer questions about that last name. Finally, for me, it was very symbolic of reclaiming who I was, the person I lost over the course of our marriage. I sure like Amy Maiden a whole lot more than I like Amy Married. ;D
But I will take T's last name when we get married (and have kids!). ;D
Amy
ETA: Ironic thing was the ex tried to convince me to keep his last name. Told me that as well known as it was in town, it would help me with contacts and networking, etc. I never really understood why he would want me to keep his name!
