I agree with the lying, Leem Safetykc: I agree with the lies leem...
The STBX called to get directions to court on Monday. I guess I am a phone book.
A long conversation ensues. I guess I wont be going to my company Christmas party next Saturday. She is going with her new boyfriend..boyfriend...at least she is calling him that. They have been seeing each other about a month and he asked her not to see anyone else but him. Kids like him. Guess things are truly over with the married man at work. Jesus. How does she move so quickly. Seperated less then 3 months ago, breaks it off with OM and then less than a month later is dating a musician.
God love those musicians. They get all the girls. ;)
I said exclusive, huh, as opposed to you not being exclusive during the commitment of marriage. LOL...good luck to him. Marriage vows didnt stop her from playing the field why should this. She asked me if I was going to the Xmas party...ummm...no...dont want to see her there with her new fella.
Apparantly might have met him, besides him being friends with people I know...he used to hang out at our coffeshop all the time. Also has a side job as a pizza delivery driver in midtown where I live. He may have delivered to us. Who knows. Hey Galil, bring back any memories... :-X
At least he isnt 19. Has 3 kids and is in his 30's. Puts everything in perspective. The night at Starbucks I was venting about 2 weeks ago where I ripped her up and down and she hinted at reconcilliation. Well apparantly "Band-Aid" stopped by after work that same night and she sobbed on him and told him all the horrible things she had ever done in all her relathionships and to me. He said I won't hold your past against you...past..a few months ago?? What a great guy..uggh :P
Why do I even care....At least I am not crying about this. I got played yet again. Would I have taken all the marital debt if I had know she had a boyfriend this last month...still had all these feelings for her? Doubt it...she knew...LOL..and to think I was worried about her signing the divorce papers. Why wouldn't she...she has an "exclusive" new relationship. Why wouldn't she want to be divorced.
Ughhh....Boy can I pick em. I need a new therapist...To think I was coming out here throwing up on OJAR over this person the last few months...crying over her...
At least now I am calm...I am clear...what a sham our marriage was...I wish I had known it...She tried to blame me again that I filed for divorce so quickly and all she wanted was space...Well she had her space, divorces could have been stopped and she has been involved with another person during our marriage and just a month after within less then two months after splitting. Good luck to her in her new life....shes going to need it.
So, just waiting for the divorce on Monday. I can already finally, finally feel like I am being truly divorced in my heart. It was too much. Finding out this isn't someone she just met with potential as she said the other night, more lies and they aren't jumping into things blah blah..lie lie...she says the "exclusive" thing was just a conversation...she wasn't planning on seeing anyone else anyway...please....I can't believe she already has brought him into the kids life. Tree trimming last night, thanksgiving...geez...daddy number 3...
:-X Oh well..Like I said not my problem anymore....clarity...I realize I have much better things and people in my life that bring me joy and happiness...I deserve better than this sh*t and will have it.
So thats it for now. Have a great day everyone...
Re:I agree with the lying Leem ChristyM: Well, if it helps any Safety, in the long run you will be in a much better place emotionally even though it doesn't seem like it now. My sister divorced her ex b/c she thought there were better things in life and she was being held back. She has gone through several different guys (always introducing them to the kids >:() and had another child with one of them. Her ex moved on after repeatedly asking for reconciliation and he became involved with a very nice girl and they got married and are still married (5 years later) and have a very stable life. My sister is now 33 and isn't even dating anyone. She told me a couple nights ago that she wishes she and her ex could get back together. She realizes now that it wasn't the bad thing she thought it was and she now envies the life he has with his new wife. Ironic, huh? I believe that's how my s2bx will end up feeling also. It will please me greatly to show him that he isn't the only one that can make myself and my daughter happy. The way your ex is going now, she will never be in a stable, fulfilling relationship. Be glad you realized how she is now before you wasted much more of your life and love on her. She isn't worth it. Hope this helped!
Christy
Re:I agree with the lying Leem leem03: What a nice thing to hear Christy. Sorry to hear about your sister's luck in love, but it sure does give me a glimmer of hope. That is what I truly think will happen with my stbx also. Once he grows up he will realize what a wonderful thing he had. Then it will be too late! I can't wait till the day comes when I will be able to say that to him.
Right now though, I'm still hoping & praying that some miracle worker will come in and fix this relationship. I know it's silly, but I do love this man & think that if we honestly worked on this, we would succeed.
But......I can't make it work on my own. So each day I hold out hope, I'm also trying to make myself realize that our relationship is over & make myself move on. Let me get off of this rollercoaster!!
Safety, obviously you are going to be better off. I would imagine that your stbx will also be muttering the worrds of why did I let him go to herself too. She seems to be in a whirlwind right now & doesn't know up from down. Keep your chin & head high. You will be better off. Monday will start your first day of real healing!
Hang in there, Monday is scaring me to death right now!
Re:I agree with the lying Leem picadilly: Safety... I'm glad things are more clear now, in the harsh light of day. You know her for what she is now, keep the memories of what she was once to you but always remember what she has become. Thats what I have to do to. I am still fresh out of my relationship and would still hope to God it can be salvaged but I know how she is. It will never be & I have to accept it, like you are starting to accept yours.
I hope all goes well for you, your new single life starts Monday.
Best of luck & talk to you later.
Re:I agree with the lying Leem Safetykc: Thanks....I appreciate that....I am still clear...just angry...
I can't believe she is taking her new boyfriend to the Christmas party at a company we both work at when she knows I was going to be there and many people know we are getting divorced next week. I mean if we had a long seperation ok...but only seperated a few months...just doesn't care how it looks...but then again, what am I saying...LMAO
This is the same woman who was having an affair with a married man at work...should I be surprised...All her men could sit at the same table, this guy, the OM, and me...Oh my... :-X :-X Gonna be sick...whew..ok..what a thought.
Yup, once again...the witch is blessd...not sure she would be ok bringing her new boyfriend if I had blown her and the OM out of the water...God I am a freaking doormat...what is wrong with me....
Ok, better know...seee...alll ;D
