When does it stop sparks: When does the hurt stop? I am divorced now and I have been dealing with this for the past year and a half. I go to counseling, go out with friends, desperatly trying to stop loving him and missing him. Im trying so hard to move on. but I feel like I am stuck right where I am at. I dont know what else to do. I go to counseling tomorrow and I dont want to talk about the divorce and how it makes me feel. I want to to talk about how to get rid of these feelings. i want to know how I can be happy again. I want to have a big, huge, genuine belly laugh that brings tears streaming down my face. i want to wake up in the morning and think of something else besides him. What can I do to make that happen?
Re: When does it stop 4sarah: I am at a 1 yr next month and unfortunately I don't know the answer for you.... For me I do better out of sight out of mind sometimes but sometimes theres nothing you can do. I still cry and feel about like the day I found out he left. Everyone says time heals everything but it sure is taking me a while too!!!!
Re: When does it stop summerparis: Belly laughs...have you watched Dave Chappelle as Rick James on season 2 of the Chappelle show? Seriously, I have watched so much comedy this past year, and IT REALLY HELPED! Laughed my ass off, forgot about my troubles, enjoyed the rest of my day.
Re: When does it stop fcard05: Hi sparks,
wish i had all the answers for you but i don't know if anyone really knows the answer other than waiting for time to do its thing. i've only been at this for going on 3 months now so in a lot of ways i'm still fighting the battle. now what i'm about to say may not apply to you since we are all wired differently and must deal with these situations in our own ways. i have been able to stop a lot of my pain by recognizing that choosing to love my stbxw is a conscious decision that i make or don't make. yes, i will always love her in some way since she is the mother of my child and we spent 14 mostly great years together, but i control the emotional hold that she has on me. when i feel the pain of yesterday's dreams and memories starting to haunt me i accept them but also tell myself that for all practical purposes my wife is dead. she may still look like my wife but the way she has treated me and now lives her life in no way resembles the person that i married. i wish things were different but i know that what we had is gone forever. so basically i just accepted the fact that the person i loved is no more and i could either spend the rest of my life lamenting her demise or spend the rest of my life getting on with living happily ever after. i know this isn't the plan any of us had for our futures with the ones we loved but there can still be a happy ending for all of us. of that, i am firmly convinced.
take care and i wish you the best!
Re: When does it stop unhappy: You will never stop loving him or missing him so you need to find a way of making peace with all of it.
you are in my prayers....
