The silence is killing me Just_Me: What does silence mean? When you share your thoughts and feelings with someone and they don’t respond what does that mean? Does that mean they just don’t care?
My ex bf is coming around after no contact for almost 5 months, and since I missed him so much I just knew God sent him back to me for good. But he’s not coming around like that, (although I’ve been seeing him every week and we talk a few times a week) I tell him how I feel, how I love him and how sorry I am for the way I hurt him. But when I share these things with him he doesn’t say anything (I usually tell him by email) he’s just goes on like nothing. Could he be scared because I hurt him before and he’s scared he’ll be hurt again or does he just not care? He told me that he wants to be with me in the “future” but when ever I talk about “now” he has no response, why is that? What is his reason for coming back around? He told me himself that we could never be just friends, so I don’t understand?
Do I need to stop telling him how much I love him and want to be with him? Is it annoying him? But it can’t be because he continuously calls me, wants to hangout and stops by my house whenever he gets a chance (he works near me, well kind of). So what is it? Why is he coming around saying we could never be just friends, but when I talk of more I get the silent treatment? It’s driving me crazy, I don’t know what to do with myself.
Re: The silence is killing me AloneandCold: Maybe he just doesn't know what it is he wants. Maybe he is afraid of being hurt again but wants to see you? In reality only he knows why he is doing what he is doing, but what is the feeling you get? Why do you think he is doing it since you know him and we do not. And HUGS!!
Bug
Re: The silence is killing me Just_Me: But what would he want to see me for?
When I am with him I feel like everything is going to be okay. Everything is perfect; we get along as if no time has passed, like nothing ever happened between us. Almost every weekend for the past few months we've spent at least 5 hours at a time just talking and laughing. And when he leaves he calls me and we talk for like an hour more. I don't get it?
Is it because he knows I’m here? Do I need to back up a little and make him want me? You know how ppl say they don’t want you until you don’t want them anymore. But even that makes no since because it’s not like I was chasing him, he came back on his own. I just don’t get it.
Re: The silence is killing me AloneandCold: It could be simply that he loves you and wants to be with you but is scared you will hurt him again.
Re: The silence is killing me jadedangel: [color=navy"> Maybe she is right and he really is trying to decide what he wants. But, I would say you need to quit telling him how you feel and that you want to be with him --- he knows by now. You need him to make a choice -- and if he can't make it without being reminded -- maybe he isn't making the right one. Make him miss it --- or he never will. If he doesn't realize who you are to him without you trying to show him -- how is it going to work?
I know silence is the crappiest thing you can get --- it's like ... "just validate my feelings dammit!" .... I don't think they get it -- but, don't keep hurting yourself by showing it and getting nothing in return.
Sticks and stones may break your bones when there's anger to inpart. Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.
-- Unknown.
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