So alone.. JKTenchi: Alright, I guess to start off.. I'm Jesse, and I met a girl named Sammi at school my 10th grade year... We quickly fell in love and it was absolutly perfect for the first year.. I'm talking, magical disney style perfect.. Anyway, About 7 months ago, she moved with her family to Michigan (I'm from West Virginia).. So, we flew back and forth to see eachother.. Actually, about 8 months into our relationship she got drunk and "Experimental" with a female friend of hers.. Not too loyal, but I didn't take it so hard...
Things started getting rough about 3 months ago, She would try to start arguements etc.. We've been together for over 2 years now.. about 2 weeks ago, she calls me and says we're over.. The next day I find out from one of her friends she's liking this guy named Alex, he's only 14 years old.. She's 17... I'm like, What the hell? I know I'm still young, I'm turning 19 soon, but it doesn't mean I feel any differently... We were engaged, and 2 years of my life were all for nothing.. It seems that every plan I had in the future was destroyed as well, as all my plans were based around her.. So anyway, the next day my car engine blows up... Things can't get worse, right? Oh, I get charged with truency in school, because I have no transportation, so, I'm perminatly removed from school 4 months before I graduate.. I'm working on a GED I suppose.. Then, right when you think things are as bad as they get, I get kicked out of my house, lose my job, and the bank is saying I overdrafted 7 months ago, I owe them a large amount of money..
So, she calls me 2 nights ago, crying.. Aparently she made out with the Alex guy, realized she still loves me, and says she's considering going back out with me.. The next day, she does the same.. Then, today she calls and says she's just done forever.. I tell her I'll ride there on a greyhound and be with her, but she just replied "I love you, more than anything, I just feel like we wont be able to work untill we can really be together".. I know it's because she has feelings for Alex, she even told me thats partially why.>
I'm just left absolutly depressed, suicidal at times.. I feel like I've lost everything valuable to me.. I don't really know what to do with myself.. I can't quit thinking about her being with another guy.. We had such amazing times... I just ... Don't know what to do.. In the last 3 weeks.. I've lost 22lbs.. I went from a size large shirt to medium..
I just got home from Coronado San Diego, I did a Navy SEAL training thing for Sony.. It'll be on http://www.socomhellweek.com .. So that was fun I suppose.. I also have a book coming out by Franklin Covey, and I've won numerous Martial Arts awards.. I've won poetry contests.. But in the end, I feel like none of that stuff matters.. Nothing matters without her.. I wish I could just stop caring.. I just.. Hold on to the chance that she might change her mind.. I have a feeling she's just gonna stick with this Alex kid...
I feel absolutly alone, defeated, and hopeless...
What can I do?...
Re: So alone.. qualt: well your 18 and alex is 14 so you should have no problem kicking his ass, and doing infront of her oh yeah and spit in his blood soaked face as you yell what now bitch. oh sorry maybe you shouldnt do that. really though it sounds like you have alot going for you that would interest any girl. i know unfortunately right now she is the only one you care about but that will change i promise. or she will come back to you. and ask yourself this. do you really want her after she made out with a 14 year old. that kinda speaks to her maturity lvl.
Re: So alone.. hardened_heart1970: remember, violence isnt the answer. im the poster boy for that. i graduated anger management.
when trust is lost, its almost impossible to regain it. do you think you can, if she were to come back?
if not, i would cut my ties right now. you have a good head on your shoulders, and can restart. this comes from my destroyed 12 year relationship....
let us know how your doing.
Re: So alone.. pflow3000: I know a lot of people around here would probably say "to be eighteen again, the things I'd do differently with the things I know now."
I know it's hard...believe me...but as you said...you're young...you have a TON of time (God willing) to find the person who is right for you...who is worthy of YOU. Forget the nonsense...no need to waste yourself (which is what will happen if you allow this to consume you) when YOU know that you deserve better treatment. And although she is young as well (don't forget we ALL make mistakes) sometimes it's better to find out early on before you've spent so many years or had a deeper committment like marriage or children.
Be sure to take time to focus on YOU...find out who you are and who you want to be...and work towards that goal...everything else will fall into place...I can't guarantee it but I'd take a BIG gamble on that.
Best wishes...
Re: So alone.. JKTenchi: I think I could still trust her, even after all this... It might take some time to regain full trust... But... I think I could...
I'm doing alright, I suppose... I haven't been able to eat, I tried to eat a sandwich, and it just made me throw up....
Not too sure I'll find someone quite like her ever again..
