Just got my child support dues.... got2blivin: So getting the child support dues in the mail really just hit me...smack! Right in the head. I had already been helping out with groceries, getting the kids things they needed, taking them to movies.....blah, blah, blah. After hearing myself just go off there, and I think I need to let everyone know that I'm very excited about getting the child support started, because it's for my children. I want the very best for them. I'm just very scared at the moment because I'm having a hard time trying to support just myself from being on my own since my girlfriend and I split up.
Paying bills by myself after having someone help me do it for 11 years is quite an adjustment. I've been doing it, but not a very good job at it...only because I don't make enough on my own. It was a lot easier with the two incomes. How does my ex do it? Geez, where do I begin? She makes a crap load of money being a waitress....yes, a waitress. The place she works is a very good one, and the people who come there are very well off so they tip her very well. Plus she is the head waitress, and has worked there the longest...therefore knowing all the regulars, and so on. Anyways, she pulls in an average of $250 in cash a day! Yeah, wish I made that kind of money. That's just on tips too!!!!
Ok, enough of my ex. The child support thing. I'm paying $716 a month for two kids. I know, I know, that probably doesn't sound bad but at the time right now, I'm very broke. And I'm worried I'm going to get in trouble with the government or something if I can't pay it all at once. Most importantly, I want to pay this so I can help support my kids better! Crap! Why does money have to rule our lives sometimes??
Does anyone know about child support, and have any suggestions? I guess I really wanted to hear someone elses story on how they did it, or struggled. Man, I just want the best for my kids!
Re: Just got my child support dues.... blizbth: I know that child support varies from state to state, but the amount you have to pay does not sound too high. But one thing you may want to check into is the amount of yearly income she is claiming for herself. If she has been at her job for over two years, her tips should be included in her annual salary. If not, she is only claiming her base pay. Does that make sense? Also, most places split your monthly child support between paychecks. They take out one half one week, and the next half the other payweek......etc. It seems like a lot of money, but you will work it out!
Re: Just got my child support dues.... got2blivin: Thanks for the reply. Yeah, I'm starting to understand how it works, and I'm going to have it setup through my employer so that it's taken out twice a month. That will definitely help out.
I believe she's only claiming her base pay, if not only a very small percentage of her tips...probably only 15% or so? I know it's not the whole truth when it comes to that, but I can't exactly say anything to anybody especially the state because she does very well and it helps OUR children out substantially. I don't want to ruin anything by blabbing it all out...you know what I mean?
Re: Just got my child support dues.... blizbth: I know what you mean, but by you making her claim her whole pay, you are not cutting your kids short. If anything, when it relieves a bit of the pressure on you for payment, you will have more extra. My husband now pays child support from a previous marriage. If the amount he pays was not so high, we could do more ourselves for his child. Its hard when it comes to birthdays and Christmas and you have paid your wife seven or eight hundred dollars, and then your child doesnt see you buying additional presents or things on your own. They dont tend to understand that you give money to mom and things she buys him are actually from you!
Also, make sure you get health insurance straight. If you are not the one carrying insurance on the children, make sure that she is not adding in the additional cost of herself to the insurance. If she carrys both kids on her health insurance you would take the premium and divide it by three and only pay for your two kids.
I guess just make sure you are not being hosed. It is easy in the beginning to feel guilty about every little thing. But you are better of to make it legally fair, and then do the spoiling later!! Trust me!!
Re: Just got my child support dues.... got2blivin: Thanks blizbth...really appreciate your reply. I totally understand it when you say I may feel guilty, cause I do! I really just want the best for my children, they mean the world to me.
Just last night I took them trick or treating and it was the best time ever! After the nice long night, I said goodbye to both of them and left to go to my house. Then my oldest son leaves this very sad message on my phone about how he wants to come to my house, and never live at mommies house again...that he really loves me a lot and doesn't want me to ever die! I couldn't believe it. When I was listening-which was in my car at the time- I pulled over and turned around to go to his house. I immediately called my ex and asked if he was alright? She said he was finally starting to fall asleep, and everything should be fine now. Oh man...I was so torn up! If only people could of heard the sadness in his voice, it's enough to make you cry your eyes out...which I did. Anyways, my ex and I had a really good talk, about the kids, and how much fun it was taking them all together like that trick or treating. I really value these times with my ex, and my children. I have a really good family!
