Is this a bad one....??? Rotteninphoenix: Ok.. first time here.. but i dont know anyone who is going through a divorce right now..
I just read some post's and it seems to have helped me out ;D
I guess i would like to tell my story, to get some things off my chest.. plz let me know if this is a bad one....
Ok... my wife and i have been together for 10 yrs, married for 3 1/2 yrs. Just last January (one year ago, wow, time fly's), she got and invite to go down to phoenix, az (we lived in Greenbay, Wi) to check out a possible future employment. (someone was checken her out on message boards). She ended up loven it down here and wanted to make a positive change in our lives (mostley her's). I agree'd since i was not happy with our neighbors, even though we had a very beutiful house. I was also not to happy with my employer also.
So we ended up moven down here, had to sell the house fast because our mortgage was so high that it was sqeezen us tight. ($10,000 lose) Everything was fine for like 2-3 weeks.. even though i was haven a tough time finding a job. Then one friday i had a real bad day, so i called her to vent, we ended up haven a fight and said we would talk in morning.. Well in the morning i said i was sorry but i just wanted someone to talk to, she ended up saying that she loved me, but was not in love with me and that she didnt want to kiss me anymore... (wow was that a blow.. when i was down, with the move and all, then she kicks me in the face)
Well then it was weird after that for like 2 weeks.. then we went on a vacation to seattle, but she was acten all weird...
Then the "big" one... she went off for a trip to denver.. where i tried to call her one night to no answer.. i was flipen out bad (Easily the worst night of my life). i truly thought some one hurt my wife... ended up being what you can guess.....
well she wouldnt come home to talk to me.. and she seemed like a new person (not a very nice or good person).. so i left for home in wisconsin.. within 1 week i new i had to come back to eather "fix" my marrage or let it go... (that week when i came back was the toughest time of my life.. and trust me i have been though some bad stuff)
Then she files for divorce in one week.. and what she is asken for is that i talke 75% debt.. she gets bmw, furniture, and 25 debt... and the stuff i got was all i could get in my car....
She is really going after me with her lawyer, almost in an evil nature.... This whole situation has almost ruined my life.. i gave everything for this women.. helped her though school, gave her support.. ect.. we had so MANY good times together.. and almost never fought..
I guess i am stuck wondering, WHY!!!!! but i will never know i guess... she has tought me the most powerfull words you can say, are nothing at all.
I am stuck down here with no one..have no confidence.. can barely go out in public.. and going though a divorce, where "my soulmate" is trying to distroy me...
I keep telling my self that i will rise again with a better life.. but i dont see the light at the end of the tunnel yet...
Re: Is this a bad one....??? 4sarah: I'm so sorry to hear that. Welcome to Ojar!!!
That settlement doesn't sound to fair to me. Do you have an attorney as well?? I know it doesn't seem like theres a light at the end of the tunnel but there is. Even if its just a small pinpoint of light. My X left me 14 months ago and I'm doing great now but I still miss him and wish I could make him understand how I feel about him but you can't. It could be a mid-life crisis or any number of excuses and she may change her mind later and may not. Just do what you have to do to help yourself through. Are there any children involved??
good luck
Sarah
Re: Is this a bad one....??? WhiskeyGirl: Wow Rotten....I'm sorry, that really sucks :-\
Welcome to Ojar, you've definately found the right place.
That settlement is nowhere near fair....did your wife work? Do you have kids? You do need an attorney, as Sarah mentioned...there is light at the end of the tunnel....stick around and read some posts of some of us who've been here a while, we've all been where you are (similar stories, similar pain) and it really does get better.
Hang in there, I'm really sorry you had to find us but ..Welcome.
Re: Is this a bad one....??? Rotteninphoenix: thank you for your posts....
Yes my wife works... becuse of her schooling and focus she has had (i always told her that our jobs come first) she makes $35 base pay and hour, with the potential to make $50-100 hour..
compare that to my $17.10 hour right now... not to fair..... I feel like i was living my dreams though her... and the train has left me behind...
yes.. i did get a attorny.. but this whole process scares me because i am wondering if i will be worse off (her attorney is telling me i will have to pay for his fees if we go to trial)....
no, we dont have kids... thank god i guess... i read a post here that when someone feels great guilt they lash out.. i hope that is the case...
thanks again... this is truly difficult
p.s.. we racked up some major debt because of the move down here (also for her certificates she needs for her job)... she is trying to stick me with 20g.... plus that 10g we lost on house, we borrowed from my parents.. that she is denying right now...
Re: Is this a bad one....??? WhiskeyGirl: Do not listen to her attorney....he's gonna say whatever he wants to scare you into settling....listen to your attorney, talk to him.
Thats not right...she makes that much more than you and you are left with all the debt??? huh-uh....I dont see that :-\
