The heart detaching from love no more tears: Hi guys and gals. Its been awhile since i posted on here..but the last couple nights alone in bed have been awfull. Its like the thoughts and images that tortured u for so long just returned out of nowhwere. So i needed to comeback and i guess just realize im not alone. Its been about 3 months now...and things are getting better...but 2nite im having 1 of those nights....and you all know what i mean. Anyways i was just reading some of my early posts and this is just a little something i posted months ago but made me feel better reading it again 2nite...so i thought i would share it for it may help you feel better also. Just read
Few things in life can make us feel crazier than expecting something from someone who has nothing to give. Few things can frustrate us more than trying to make a person someone he or she isn't; we feel crazy when we try to pretend that person is someone he or she is not. We may have spent years negotiating with reality concerning particular people from our past and our present. We may have spent years trying to get someone to love us in a certain way, when that person cannot or will not.
It is time to let it go. It is time to let him or her go. That doesn't mean we can't love that person anymore. It means that we will feel the immense relief that comes when we stop denying reality and begin accepting. We release that person to be who he or she actually is. We stop trying to make that person be someone he or she is not. We deal with our feelings and walk away from the destructive system.
We learn to love and care differently in a way that takes reality into account.
We enter into a relationship with that person on new terms - taking ourselves and our needs into account. If a person is addicted to alcohol, other drugs, misery, or other people, we let go of his or her addiction; we take our hands off it. We give his or her life back. And we, in the process, are given our life and freedom in return.
We stop letting what we are not getting from that person control us. We take responsibility for our life. We go ahead with the process of loving and taking care of ourselves.
We decided how we want to interact with that person, taking reality and our own best interests into account. We get angry, we feel hurt, but we land in a place of forgiveness. We set him or her free, and we become set free from bondage.
This the heart of detaching with love.
Today, I will work at detaching in love from troublesome people in my life. I will strive to accept reality in my relationships. I will give myself permission to take care of myself in my relationships, with emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual freedom for both people as my goal.
Good luck and best wishes to all who may read this
Re: The heart detaching from love flyaway: Excellent way to articulate this point.....boundaries are so important.
Thanks for posting! :)
Flyaway
Re: The heart detaching from love lightseeker: No more tears. Beautiful. So well said. You obviously are far more in touch with reality than some of us. I completely think you are right on with this and I have thought the same for some time. For me it's just been a matter of making my actions reflect my beliefs. It will come. Best to you.
Re: The heart detaching from love Dragon: :) Wow!! Awesome!!! That made me feel really good.
Thank you so much!!!
~Dragon
Re: The heart detaching from love seashell61061: So beautifully said and just where I am this week. I can't thank you enough for your words. I still struggle but I've gone for about 4 months with wanting someone to love me that doesn't. I have been in such confusion and realizing that they just don't and never love me, has actually set me free. Understand, it took denial and giving more of myself than I should and I still want to go into denial, but thank you, only someone going through this understands. Thank you for a place that I can go to express my feelings.
