It even happens to beautiful people. justmenow: How interesting - I was up late last night flipping through the channels (with a remote control that belongs ONLY TO ME, might I add...) and came across Oprah. Halle Berry was a guest last night and she was talking with great candor about her recently failed marriage.
She was very open about her X's sex addiction and how hard she (and he) tried to make it work, how much they loved each other, and what she finally had to do for herself - leave. What an incredible woman she is, not only drop-dead gorgeous, but very smart, well spoken and strong, yet still vulnerable. You could hear the pain and disappointment in her voice as she calmly told her story. The story was so similar to things I've heard out here on this board.
She was talking about the self-doubt and the "what did I do wrong" and the "what should I have done better" and the RED FLAGS she looks back on now and says she should have paid attention to. She said one of the red flags was that when she got a gut feeling that he was running around on her (and he was), he would turn it around to making her feel like she was insecure and needy. Sound familiar anyone? She said that THIS time around she is never going to ignore her gut feelings again. Amen, sister...
Now if Halle Berry, a woman whom I have always admired for her poise and grace and beauty, is going through this cr@p, then maybe I should not feel so bad about what I'm going through. This puts me on the same level as her, except I have an advantage - my divorce wasn't played out in the tabloids and I got to experience my devastation privately. The only person I have to discuss my woes with is my counselor, not Oprah.... God Bless her for sharing, though. It helped.
As a side thought - I'm unsure of my opinions about "sex addiction", but if a man could have a woman like Halle Berry, or Jennifer Lopez, or any of the other incredibly gorgeous women like them and STILL run around on them then they MUST have something wrong in their brains. It also makes me think that maybe my X didn't run around on me because I wasn't good enough - it was because HE wasn't good enough. I deserve better.
Re:It even happens to beautiful people. picadilly: Your so right, JMN.
As a regular joe, I see these tabloid stories about the famous, beautiful people & go "wow, thats f*cked up". Who the hell cheats on women like that? I don't know, I guess some people are insane, or if your rich & famous enough as well, women throw themselves on you. Whatever. crazy people. All though, this doesn't explain Hugh Grant's stupidity.
Maybe this is why Julia Roberts married that guy, he's not famous & she can compete well enough against an ex-wife?
Re:It even happens to beautiful people. justmenow: Yeah, I can't quite figure out the Hugh Grant thing either... temporary insanity maybe? :P
Re:It even happens to beautiful people. Luv2drive85: I just wanted to add that there are 2 sides to every story- and the reason I say this is b/c NO ONE knew what happened behind closed doors in my house....not until last summer when we had company over did people get a sneak peak at the viciousness in my stbx husband.
He was always so nice, jovial, charismatic around others. Who would have thought he'd call his wife a c*nt or a tw*t!!!
yup, he did! a few other names too.....oh but thats right, he was mad at the time, he's sorry.....not! you appologize for doing something once. but multiple times? the word 'sorry' tends to lose its value when abused.
Not to side with anyone...it was just food for thought. Glad to be apart of this site...helps alot.
Re:It even happens to beautiful people. picadilly: This is so true. But we were just talking about people cheating on others, there is no excuse for that. & there is never any good excuse for abuse either.
Welcome to Ojar.
Be well.
