new guy michaelvienna26: hi all,
Heres my story,
i am from australia and came to austria on a holiday. met a girl, 7 years older, and we fell in love and married after 4 months. i never really adapted to the place or the culture (Vienna) . I dont have much of a social life here and after 5 years marriage my wife who i still love tells me she needs her space and that i am clinging on too much to her. i suppose i am but it hurts so much to be without her. we have not yet divorced but i wonder if there is a road back? will we fall in love again? have no friends here and feel very lonely. i miss the hugs when i cry and seeing that someone i loved for 5 years doesnt feel the same way back. how does a person get through this- i am totally lost. my parents are divorced so going home to sydney would be very difficult. i ont want to run from the problem. my wife refuses to have marriage counselling as she says it is not her who is mad.
thats my story so far. all of this hit me about 2 weeks ago while we visited my younger brother whom m y wife is still very very friendly to.
mick in vienna
Re:new guy amess: Hi Mick,
I think we can all identify with your pain, most of us have been left, and it is the most unbearable pain I have ever dealt with. Things do ease up a bit, I am now 3 months into it, and although far, far from the healing point, the pain is not as intense. You've come to the right place, just keep posting and talking, and read the threads. It must be even worse when you are in a foreign country. If your wife refuses counseling, then is it impossible to go home, where at least you will understand your surroundings? Even for awhile? Stay strong, and hugs.
Re:new guy michaelvienna26: thanks very much for you kind reply. I feel if i go home that i only run from the problem. my brother writes lots of poems to my wife which begins to make me wonder. (he is 22) Am I going crazy? I hate this jealousy feeling which is coming up. It seems everytime i open my mouth to my wife i say the wrong things.
mick
Re:new guy amess: What are your circumstances? Are you separated, did she say she wants a divorce? Is your brother in Australia? I'm having a little difficulty piecing this together. I hear that you think returning to Australia is running from the problem, but why would it be too hard to return just because your parents are divorced? As far as your wife and brother are concerned, it could be totally innocent, or something more. The only way to know is to confront both of them, or maybe your brother, at least, as to why he is writing all of this poetry to her. Maybe you will get the answer you need to know. Stay strong.
