Sign papers tomorrow Tantan: I called my lawyer yesterday. We already had a mediation agreement drawn up so i faxed it to him and he said our papers will be ready fro signing to morrow. This all happened really fast !!!
It should take about 2 months until they are passed through court.
I feel so bad today......It sucks to feel like your are forced in to filling fo divorce. My cjoices were either stay married to a man who is cheating on me everyday or gather up whatever self respect i have left and file for divorce, at least i will be able to move on with my life ( how I dont know ? ).
He says he will be there to sign the papers, he feels he doesnt have a choice.......this pissed me off. he has had all the choices, including deciding that he would rather stay with OW instead of not divorcing.
I feel empty and sad.
I know in my heart he will regret this, but not enev that is helping me to feel better today.
How could I love this man still ?
Re:Sign papers tomorrow Druid13: I felt the same way. How could I love someone who had told me they would continue cheating on me? That is the one thing I have kept in the back of my head over my situation. Better question....that sometimes comes back to me...where the hell is the person I DID love? Becuase she...sure as hell...is not ther person I loved. Thinknig about what she 'used to be' for me is a very painful experience. When she tells me things like she will always care about me...wants to be a friend etc....I want to tell her where to go. Why don't people understand when you have done something so severe expecting to be friends is practically impossible? What is so hard to understand about that? Still it all hurts...and I understand what you are saying....I sometimes wonder if my ex thinks of me....regrets doing what she did...( I've changed alot- for the better)....I guess I should not think about those things...but it is natural. Another thing my ex likes to claimI was neglectful etc etc....I did spend time on other things...that were positive...playing in bands to make extra money...teaching kids the drums etc...for extra money which I would prommptly hand over to her most of the time...I was not spending my time cheating on my spouse...so who was really neglectful? She also said I took her for granted....what did she take me for then? Worse than..."for granted"...that is for sure.
Re:Sign papers tomorrow Kinney26: My papers are supposed to be ready to sign in the next few days. My stbx left me for nothing, except, "I just not happy". and "I don't want to try and I don't feel that way about you anymore". Over 3 months of her being a cold b***h and I Still want her back badly. I don't know why I can't stop having feeling for her, but I have wanted her back worse the last few days.
Re:Sign papers tomorrow recentlydiscarded: I was supposed to go to my husband's lawyer's office today with him to discuss things so he could get the initial papers drawn up. The appointment is at three. But I bailed. Left town. Told my husband that I just couldnt do it. It's only been a little over two weeks since the seperation and Im not ready to do that. I need time. Time away from it all. I need to distnace myself from him and gather myself. Im still an emotional basketcase. If I see him now I fear I will break down again and make a fool of myself. I dont want to beg him for another chance. It's not my fault this is happening. Am I a coward? Should I let someone force me to end my marriage. SHould I just sign the papers and get it over with? I dont have it in my heart. Not right now at least. Like Kinney my husband did not have an affair (at least not that I know of). He left us because he "just wanted to be single and wasnt happy anymore". Ugh. Maybe it would be easier if he had.
A friend of mine called me last night. Apparently my husband is having no problem telling everyone we know that we are no longer together. She heard and called to see if I was ok. I was humiliated. I feel ashamed. I dont want to tell people. I dont want to explain it all to our friends. Lord only knows what he's telling people about me. How long will I feel this way? Why am I embarassed to tell people? I feel so lost amd worthless.
Re:Sign papers tomorrow cloud: You may feel lost. But you are not worthless.
Not at all. And you need to stop telling yourself that.
Were you worthless before you met him? Did he take pity on you and want to marry you because of that? No.
Divorce is not an easy thing to go through and if you need to take more time before talking through things--you have every right to take more time.
And your husband may be going around telling people that you are split but that may be his way of getting it out in front of people before you do. The separation is so new that he may think he has the world on a string but once reality sets in, his attitude may come back to reality.
The most important thing to remember is that you are special--regardless of what he is doing.
