The Lone Ojarian recentlydiscarded: Ok since Im the only one loggd in I will share what happened to me this evening.
Tonight my cell phone rings. I perked up for a second thinking that it was HIM.......I pick up the phone and see that it is not him, but his mom. I take a deep breath and answer. It has been over two weeks since I ve heard from her (even though she told me the day after HE kicked us out that she loved us and wanted to stay in constant contact with us to make sure we are ok and getting through this. she said they would be there for us no matter what). Anyways she called and asked how we were and said that she was just making sure we were ok. Of course it wasnt the same as when we used to talk because now there is that uncomfortable unspoken wall between us. She asks me if Im doing ok and I tell her Im still alive. We end up talking about him some and she says he isnt saying much to them but he did tell them that we were both miserable in the marriage and knew it for a long time so it wasnt a big surprise that he wanted out. TOTAL B.S!! I was absolutely clueless that he was unhappy. She said she wasnt taking sides but he did give her a totally different story than what Im telling her....BIG surprise eh? I told her that he was making it sound mutual so he didnt look so bad for kicking us out on our @sses. She was kinda quiet but I told her everything exactly as it happened, including how he's completely shutting out our son. She agreed that it was wrong for him to do but I couldnt help but feel she was just saying what she thought I wanted to hear. She said she didnt think there was anyone else and that he said he was just unhappy and wanted out as soon as possible.
Anways after about 5 minutes it was fairly obvious that he had lied to his parents about the entire thing, which I already had figured he would. I ended up more annnoyed after they called than I was before because they hadnt called. It was like she was calling not because she cared about me but because she felt guilty about everything. She was short with me and didnt give me much information. It is frustrating because we had a great relationship before any of this and now she talks to me like Im a stranger with a crush on her son.
I let her talk to the baby and told her she was welcome to call or come and see him anytime. She said they had hoped we would work it out and stay together , and I told her "yeah so did I". Apparently she is gonna pay him a surprise visit tomorrow and force him to talk to her about it all. I hope she catches him with another woman or something. She can knock the bird crap off the halo she puts on his freakin head and see the truth about him. Im the victim here, not him. She says she will call me in the next two days after she talk to him...but I wont hold my breath.
Is it silly to be so angry and bitter towards his parents? It's like they dont even care that he has completely abandoned his family and left us with nothing. They werent even concerned enough to call and check on their only grandson for the past two weeks knowing that we had been kicked out of our home, I have no job, no money, no place to go, nothing! Ok I need to take a breather.....just wanted to vent.
Re:The Lone Ojarian recentlydiscarded: At this point I dont care what they think about me. They can pretend he's not the bad guy if they want but deep down inside they know their son.
Im just pissed that he's making it sound like we both wanted out just so he doesnt sound like such a b@stard. Whatever. If he sleeps at night knowing what he's done to me and our son then good riddance. His parents didnt have an effect on our lives before so it wont make any difference now.
Re:The Lone Ojarian amess: I have it the same way. He told them it was mutual. I told them differently, plus a few other choice things about him that they didn't know. Still, they rallied around him, as I knew they would. I hoped it would be different, but I didn't expect it. Especially because he is a saint in his family's eyes, and is his mother's prince. He can do no wrong. They close their eyes to everything. I can hear his mother saying that he should do whatever makes him happy, and I know he's made me out to be Torquemada reincarnated. They have not called me once. My family can't stand him. When the breakup is bad, that's the way it goes, I guess.
Re:The Lone Ojarian JTS: RD, I think that it is fairly normal for the relationship of the ex's parents to go bad because that is their child and they are going to stick by them good or bad. I gutted and renovated a house for my MIL and did all of the maitainance and when my ex left for OM the first time her mom told her to stay marriaged for the kids but just continue the affair discreetly until after they have graduated. In my situation I am far better off without either of them. At least yours said she was going to go talk to him. Hopefully yours will go better. :)
Re:The Lone Ojarian Kinney26: At the beginning of this while thing her family was on my side. They were all pissed at her for the way she went about things and they weren't nice to her. THey all told me if I wanted to talk to them not to hesitate. For a while I did and they were very cool. Guess what, I haven't talked to them in about a month now. THe other day I picked my son up from her mom's and her mom left the room as soon as she saw me at the door, didn't say hi or anything. No matter what happens they will always end up on the side of their child. Even if they are being fed a nice healthy dose of bullS**t. My stbx has made our relationship seem 100 times worse than it really was. She just needs a way to justify her actions and get her family back on her side.
Interesting. As I respond to this, I too am the only person logged on.
