SO confused!! KYSongbirdnNC: My husband and I have been married barely over a year and a half. He just isn't the man I thought he was. My self-esteem is lower than ever before. We dated for 3 yrs. I honestly thought I knew him, but it took moving 3 states away to learn the person he really is. After many times of trying to talk to him about the problems we have had, it took me telling him that I have given my notice at work and I'm moving back to where we came from, to get him to realize that I am serious about this. No one should have to do the work of 2 people.
This conversation just took place 2 nites ago. The hurt is horrible. All he could muster the courage to say is "Well, how are we going to split all of this up?" We just built a house, moved in the end of Feb. this yr. Only 2 pymts. have been made. He had a large sum of money from the sale of his house he had before we were married. That money was put into OUR home. Since that was pre-marital property, am I not entitled to anything, even tho it was put toward the cost of our new home? The money was received a year after we were married. I have went through all of the bank statements figuring everything thing substantial that was bought. Mind you, I have never been able to spend as he does. I only work p/t making $11 an hr. I GAVE UP a $50-$60,000 a year job to be here with him, since his job transferred him. I know since we have been married such a short amount of time that I'm not entitled to a whole lot. All I know is that I DO deserve something. I gave up too much to have to start over from scratch again.
We have both said that we want to keep this out of court. We want to settle everything ourselves. I only hope that can be done. We just need a starting point... something that is fair to both of us. (well, as fair as can be in this situation) I've called every atty. in the phone book. No one will give advice over the phone. Its ridiculous.
How do we put a dollar sign on everything? Most importantly, how do I keep my sanity? This is absolutely killing me, but I cannot spend the rest of my life living like I have been. Life is much too short.
Any advice or information regarding the property will be GREATLY appreciated!!!
Thx! TS
Re: SO confused!! totallyconfused: You should see an attorney to find out exactly what you can do. I can tell you from experience that you have to prepare yourself to just let some things go. Good luck.
TC
