Am I suppose to be silent?

Am I suppose to be silent? barelybreathing: Okay, got an email today from a couple friend of "ours".  They wanted to make sure that I had tried everything to save the marraige.  That I had been humble and that I had no pride and no ego.  That I needed to think of my actions for our daughter's sake.  That I need to compromise.  That would be their Christmas wish for us to resolve this and get back together as a family.  This is the same family that sent me the Christmas card yesterday.

I was absolutley insensed.  If they only knew the TRUTH!  If they knew about his AFFAIR!  How he has abandoned all his responsiblities.  If they only knew how compromising I have been.  How forgiving I am.  Gosh.  I can't even defend myself.  The shame of revealing what he did to church members of mine is too much for me.  Too much.  So I get to be looked at as one who left and did not try....

I am not happy right now.  Such injustice.  I did call my s2bx and read him the email.  Cause this is his best friend.  S2bx said he would call him and tell him that it was not me and that I have tried everything.  Big flippin deal, he should just tell the world that he is an adulterer.  So people can stop looking at me like I was the one.  Arghhh.....    
Re: Am I suppose to be silent? nerak: I don't have any brilliant advice.  Just wanted to say that I'm so sorry.  That is a really tough one.  

Hang in there.
 Re: Am I suppose to be silent? barelybreathing: Thanks....it is tough.  The scornful looks, the being treated like a leper, all of it.  

I carry around the truth and am respectfully silent.  I don't want my daughter to grow up with people knowing about this.  Geez.

Guess my silence is going to come with a heavy burden.  Scrutiny of me.


 Re: Am I suppose to be silent? Brian75034: "..They wanted to make sure that I had tried everything to save the marraige.  That I had been humble and that I had no pride and no ego.  That I needed to think of my actions for our daughter's sake.  That I need to compromise."

How rude.  I couldnt consider them friends...at least not after that.  Some people just have no manners or "couth".


 Re: Am I suppose to be silent? MissAnonymous: BB, girl that made me [color=Red"> >:(MAD >:([/color"> !

I totally agree with Brian.  HOW RUDE!

I bet if they knew he had an affair, they'd probably still tell you to be a good christian and "forgive" him of his trespasses.

I know exactly what you're going through with all of your preachy relatives and friends who mean well.  They tell you to do your best, compromise, forgive(ALL THINGS ALWAYS), sacrifice all of your being and who you really are just so the "marriage" can survive.  Don't these people know that once you start doing that there is no marriage to save?!?!?!?!????

That's why I haven't told anyone, not even my own parents what hubby and I are going through.  They were the ones who helped us get back together 6 years ago when I should have ran like hell from him.  All my mom knows is that I'm in counseling and he had a "fling".

Oh yeah, and she keeps telling me to "pray for him 3x a day.  Things will get better.  God has a plan for him."  blah  :Pblah  :Pblah  :P