One Year in_search_of: S:
I realized that after I talked to you, that at this time last year, I was on the phone with you, letting you know that you were a divorced man. I had gone to court, gotten the papers signed by the judge it took about 10 minutes total.
We have survived a year apart, though, not really apart since we are some of the lucky ones, in that we can be friends.
Thank you for your friendship, support and caring in the past year. And in the years to come. I am so glad that you have met S and that you two are doing well. But, the day hit me hard, as I was pulling out the stockings, two of them, what do I do, hang two, or just mine...and then the "our first christmas" ornament, that I had looked at and looked at and looked at, and that you got me, because I couldn't bring myself to spend that kind of money on one ornament.
And now, I suppose that it is one year down, the rest of my life to got, and while I know that we are not meant to be together, but I appreciate you being my friend. Since that is what we were best at anyway!
Love to you
ISO
Re:One Year Suddenly Single: Very nice letter B.
Are you going to send it to him?
;D
Re:One Year in_search_of: No, I don't think so, I just needed to have it out there. Just a good guy, and I am glad that we get to be friends, and still have one another in our lives.
Re:One Year Suddenly Single: Yeah, I totally know what you mean about getting it out there. It really helps and makes a difference. I am feeling another letter coming on for me too.
Re:One Year in_search_of: Ummmm, wow, I still think the things I said about you, but I just found out today that you told the new girlfriend that she is the first love of your life, talk about a kick to the gut. I will never tell you that I found out, I will never let on, and how I found out, well that just is not important. I wish I could say that the next person that I love will be my first love, I wish I could give them that, but you know what, I can't because I gave that to someone else. But you know what, I was not even able to tell you that YOU were my first love. But, that is because I would never deny what I had with the person that was my first love. I hope that this is a way that you are choosing to protect yourself, and not the truth. I just hope and pray. But I suppose it might be true, maybe you didn't love me, maybe I didn't love you, but well, that is not true, because I did, not in the way that I should have perhaps in order to be married to you. But I did/do love you, and always will, and that will be a part of me. I know that is not how things are dealt with in your family, and that I hold up a good portion of this friendship, perhaps you would like to be like your uncle and just have me be gone, so that you would never have to think about me or talk to me again, all I can say is that unless you call me, or attempt to talk to me, I will be letting the friendship fall on you for a while.
I also know that you have appologized for things you did to people while you were with me, and I know that you blame me for lots of those things. Well, guess what, if you had a pair, and were able to stand up for yourself, then perhaps you would not have this whole set of apologies to give out. I am not your whipping post, and will not be.
Do what you have to, in order to heal, but just know that in the process of doing that you have hurt other people.
Good luck to you, and as I said, this friendship rests on you for a while.
