so insensitive! fivepointedstar: In a way I feel kinda funny posting this here, given that I've read far worse stories, but it just hurt so much and I feel the need to vent about it.
STBX (I've never actually called him that until now) and I have been married for 7 years, have 3 kids, have separated twice and are now finally calling it quits. We've been pretty civil and friendly towards each other, and I feel pretty good about our decision until I start to think about having a romantic relationship with someone else. I haven't been with anyone other than him in 10 years so when I imagine being with someone romantically I imagine him. But, anyway, I'm dealing with it and I know I don't want to be with him, especially now. . .
We're still living together, waiting a little while before we file just because there are details to be worked out. We both want to stay in the house, so that is going to take some hashing out and some time for me to find out if I get a job that I've applied for so in the meantime we're both here. Anyway, last night I went down to his office because I had to ask him something about one of the kids and I could hear him talking on the phone in a hushed voice. I went down, he told the person to hold on, we talked, and then I went upstairs. He was talking on his cell phone which was kind of odd, and as I went back upstairs he was telling this person what I had come to talk to him about, so it was clearly a personal call (not a business call, he works from home.) Well, when I got to the top of the stairs I hear him say, in his flirtatious voice, "No, I want to hear what you like." It was clear that it was a woman and he was flirting.
I've read stories on here of exes that have done far worse things, so I know it's not much, but we've been so civil until now, and I just can't believe how insensitive he is in pursuing a relationship while we're still living under the same roof! He can't even bear to be alone for 10 minutes! AT this point I'm just feeling like all civility is out the window and I'm just going to continue to ignore him as I've been doing since this whole thing happened. Such a jerk! At least it's just confirmation.
Re:so insensitive! ratchet5: So sorry that you are going through this!! Your a bigger woman than I to still be living under the same roof with him!! ;)
My only thought on the subject, and believe me, I'm no expert on any of this stuff. But you made the comment that he can't be alone for 10 minutes. Yes it's very rude, but do you think maybe he is preparing himself for when you are gone? To have someone else to talk to or be with, cause he can't handle being alone?
Just a thought, like I said, I screwed my relationship all up, so I'm probably the last person in the world to give advice. But I have been on both sides, and that is what jumps out at me from what you wrote. Still doesn't make it right though!! Hang in there, sounds like you are doing an admirable job of doing the right thing!! :)
