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need help asap

need help asap exclusive: I met my X sister the other day, i thought she new everything, but she didnt and i told her sister we had sex, so my X wasnt happy about this, but also on new years when we argued, i was holding my X tight so she wouldnt go away, i bruised her, when i got back i said to her, i wish i did it harder, i new i shouldnt have said this, and am a total dicck for saying that,
now today my x sister bought up the sex issue, so my X went angry and told her about the bruising issue, now they all think am lieing, and they both hate me,

over the phone we both said horrible things to each other,

what the hell do i do, and my X said she is glad its over, and my X sister said i would have cheated on me as well

brokenman: My only advice would be to step back and leave it alone. You are talking about an ex here and they are going to think and say whatever the hell they want to about you. As long as you are honest and do right nothing they say can really overcome the truth. It may hurt because you still care what they think, but to me, the only way to solve the problem is to not care anymore. And the "no contact" rule goes a long way. Don't have contact, period. And if you HAVE to (kids, work, debt) then make it minimal and all business.

 Dino: Brokenman is right. Ex's aren't the same person now. Once they make that break from you, you can't expect to be treated well from them.
Break off contact. It's the best thing for you right now. If you feel like calling her, do something else, anything, but dont call.
 bill23: [quote author=bitterdino link=board=1;threadid=8587;start=0#msg68121 date=1109974238">
Brokenman is right. Ex's aren't the same person now. Once they make that break from you, you can't expect to be treated well from them.

I agree with Broken and Dino... but Dino's statement struck me as odd because it's so true for me in this situation. I'm not on good terms AT ALL with my last ex (I refuse to talk to her at all because she just doesn't acknowledge or accept her dishonesty/betrayal of trust)... which is strange because I'm on GREAT terms with all my other ex'es. It didn't matter who did the leaving the other times, we always remained caring and affectionate and even loving... but with this one, there was a palpable change in personality and attitude towards me and towards us... decidedly unaffectionate and cold at times. A VERY different person... I wonder if it has to do with a person's tendency or ability to lie or not. In all my past relationships, we've maintained some level of honesty (when there's been an expectation of it, that is)... this was my one experience with extreme dishonesty and lying and I wonder if that has anything to do with the change in attitude and personality? I'm sorry, I don't mean to hijack the thread... Dino's statement just gave me some food for thought...
 exclusive: its reallu hurtful, somtimes i wish that they both have a really bad argument

this is what i e-mailed, to her sister

I understand your anger with me, but i seriously thought *** told you everything. I wish i spoke to you about it, i understand that you dont want to hear my side out,

but i would never hit ***, i was holding ***, and thats how i bruised her, and this is wat i said when she showed it me,

i wish i did it harder.

Now as soon as i said it i know i f*cked up big time, and regretted it, am sorry we didnt speak about it, but i am not scared to talk to you about it because i know what i did wrong and am not going to hide it.

I didnt say new years was personal, we just didnt speak about it.

this is what she said

do not e-mail me. what u did was wrong and if u had done the same thing to me i would have dumped u that day and would never have spoken to u again. my sister is an idiot speakin to a malicious, vindictive, lying, abusive git like u.


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