Things I haven't told you niceone251: OK-
I am the one leaving, and you say you don't want this divorce. You are angry that I won't go to counseling with you. Well, what you don't know is this. I am leaving because you are manipulative and controlling, and I truly think you are not capable of unconditional love. I gave and gave, for 16 years, and you never gave back in return. I have nothing else to give you.
I am a good man-a thoughtful, considerate man-who gave you some of the best years of my life. I truly don't think you are capable of realizing what you haven't given to me, and what I have let you take from me. All I ever wanted was a woman who was thoughtful and considerate of my feelings-a woman who I could truly open up to and give of myself to without fear of being taken advantage of. Instead what I got was a woman who thought of me as little more than a paycheck, and who decided that she didn't like sex, so she left me alone in bed for years on end. I deserve better than that, and I plan to find it. And when I do find that woman, I will make her happier than you will ever know. There are women who would kill for what you are losing, which is a nice, decent, honest, reasonably attractive, very successful guy who wants nothing more than to have a woman who will share love and mutual affection with him.
You always said that your father treated your mother like a queen. Well, that was because your mother earned that treatment by taking care of her husband. Somehow you didn't learn that lesson. It's a two way street, sugar, and maybe, if you stopped being so g*ddamned self centered you might realize that.
You are losing the best thing that ever happened to you. You now know that, I can see. All it took to keep me was a little effort on your part, but you decided you were too busy, and too selfish, to put in even a minimal amount of effort. For God's sake, you don't even work, have a housekeeper, and the kids are in school all day, and you can't even fix dinner or make time for sex every now and then? Hell, I am so easygoing, it wouldn't have taken much. But it's too late now-I'm outta here, and I plan to find someone who will appreciate me.
The more I write, the madder I get, so maybe I should stop here.
It's your loss, and my gain.
Re:Things I haven't told you 1973kendoll: Figures your straight man, LOL (Please dont hit me, LOL). I hope you find your way. Were here for you, sounds like shes losinfg alot. Stay strong!!
Re:Things I haven't told you niceone251: To add insult to injury, she called me this morning to tell me that she was going to tell people that this was all my idea, and that she subscribed to our church's doctrine that divorce was only acceptable where there was abuse, alcoholism, etc. SO, a wife can treat her husband like sh*t, ignore him, deny him sex, take advantage of him, belittle him, and the husband is supposed to take it? In my case, I knew where I was headed-into "affair land". I would start having affairs, get a mistress, whatever-just to find some happiness with a woman. Then I would be the philandering husband, and she would be the poor housewife, sitting at home all alone while her no good husband ran around on her.
ARRGH-this whole thing makes me so damn mad sometimes. Well, at least I know the truth.
And yes, I am very straight-sorry.
Re:Things I haven't told you i_sing_alone: Funny how the nice guys and the nice girls.. and people with the same ideas of love/marriage/relationship values rarely end up together.
You sound like a catch. Keep up the positive self-image. Her loss.
Re:Things I haven't told you niceone251: The worst part of a divorce is the battering your self esteem takes. Since this started, however, I have had several people tell me what a good person I am, and how, somewhere down the road a woman would love to have me. That really makes me feel good, and shows me the garbage I endured at home.
