Here is my story kchopper5: I'll try to make this short and sweet but that may be an impossibility. I guess I'm mainly looking for some advice.
On February 11th I found out that my wife was spending alot of time getting to know one of her co-workers. So much time that he was going on a trip with her to New Orleans. I had known about the trip, it was a trade off for my trips to Pittsburgh to see my beloved Pittsburgh Steelers. Anywho, since that time I have debated with myself as to whether I could continue to have this stuff happen to me (3rd time). Well as you can imagine the tension in my house has been ridiculous. I've been angry, sad, irate the whole gamut of emotions.
I told her that if she went on the trip with him that it will be very difficult for me to overcome. She claims that she has not had sex with him just kissing. I find that funny since she hardly kisses me or shows me any affection period. She returned from her trip on March 19th and informed me that she didn't want to stay home with me. Oh I guess I forgot to mention the 2 kids that we have and the new mortgage and all that fun stuff. So she came home on the 19th for a little while and said she was leaving. I asked her to at least stay the night because the kids had missed her and they would like to spend some time with her. Well on this day she informed me that she was in love with this other guy and was not "in love" with me anymore.
At this time she made a proposal to separate that involved us still living together and every other Friday and Saturday would be our free day to do as we please. She left it at that and left for the night. I informed her the next day that in a perfect world you can separtate like that but in my world it won't happen. She came home crying saying she wants to make it work, then she doesn't then she does, basically playing with my head. All this leads to yesterday where I found out this other guy had called my house Wednesday night while I was at work (this is when they talk to each other when I'm at work real nice). I informed her that this is no longer about her its about me and I want a divorce.
All this leads me to my question. We have no money to spend for lawyers and courts. Is it possible to draw up you're own separation agreement if both parties are in agreement as to how it will work. I will admit that I am a flawed person and I have my problems but if she could have found it in herself to approach me and talk to me I believe none of this would have happened.
Re:Here is my story Ladybug: Good for you Chopper
I think one of the hardest parts of getting a divorce is making the decision to do it. You have to look out for yourself now. She has shown you, your family and your marriage vows nothing but disrespect. It not easy, but now that you've made the decision, you can start the grieving/healing process.
There are low cost divorces available, but my lawyer was worth every dime. My divorce went before a judge and cost me $3000.00, (XH had to pay $1000 of that) but I could not have stood up to my ex if we had gone one on one.
Good luck...use the support offered here. It's helped me a lot.
Re:Here is my story riversandlakes:
Great for you Chopper.
You decided there and then.
JUST kissing?! Mercy on her soul...
